I used to love to play basketball. From the age of about 8 until 18 years old, much of my energy was focused on competitive basketball. It’s funny how until the age of 15 I honestly thought I was going to play in the NBA. Oh well, nothing wrong with a little dream huh?
I don’t know, but I think I lost my love for basketball soon after high school. I was offered a couple opportunities to play D2 and D3 ball, but I think I was just tired of the time it took to be good at it. Either way I had my heart set on attending the University of Texas, and up until the first few months of my freshman year I actually thought it would be possible to walk-on to the basketball team. THAT was a dumb dream, not because dreams are dumb, but because I hadn’t done anything to prepare for that.
I played maybe once a week during my first year of college (I lived a stone’s throw from Gregory Gym), but once I moved off campus I rarely played. Things were even worse after college. Even in situations where I had a chance to play, I still didn’t really want to lace up my shoes and just play. This is one of the few reasons why I am lucky to be a graduate student here at UGA. There’s a rec center on campus and I have made it a point to play when I have time (which is a LOT more often than I did in college). I’m 26 now and I’m not in the best shape that I was when I was 18. The 18 year-old me would run circles around me now. But I still kinda “have it” and every now and then there are flashes that remind me why I loved to play so much.
But even if I play during intramural season, or I join some kind of competitive league, the games will never mean as much as they once did. The option for me now is to play pick-up ball, which is its own kind of animal. I really like playing ball, but I enjoy the workout even more. That’s something you definitely appreciate more as you get older (and heavier), the workout. Basketball is a great workout, and pick-up ball is a low-investment, low-emotional way to get a great workout. After playing pick-up ball for so many years I have grown to appreciate what it’s really all about. So I thought I’d touch a little bit on the norms, and slang associated with playing ball at your local gym, recreation center, or playground. And then top it off when some things to not do.
When you walk in the gym….
The first thing you need to figure out when you get to the court is when the hell you can play. It’s almost like walking into a bar and determining what women you can potentially talk to. There’s an understood way to get into a game, and the first thing you need to figure out is “who’s got next.” The rules are simple, if you win, you stay in, if you lose, you’re out. Therefore you need to figure out who is playing after the game that is currently going on in front of you. Once you figure out who has next (or next-next, three-down, etc.) the next question that almost always follows from you is “you got five?” This is basically a way of saying, “I want to play right now, and if you don’t have five players on your team yet, I would like to play.” Sometimes you get lucky and you get “picked up” by that guy, but usually you still have to wait it out.
If the guy who has next already has five dudes, then you need to find the last dude that has next. If the gym is full, you may have to wait three or four games until you get on the court. This is the advantage of playing at a rec center with multiple courts. If there is a long wait at one court, you can just check out another court. Depending on your skill level though, there is always a “good” court, where the real dudes play. My ego doesn’t allow me to stray too far from the “good” court, but when I’ve had a string of bad performances, I’ll go to the second best court just so I can boost my confidence.
Also, every court/gym has different rules as to how many points a team needs to score to win. Here at UGA’s Ramsey Center, winning team gets 12 points first, everything counts as 1. I like this because it discourages three point shots. Of course some dudes still jack it up from long range. At Texas’s Gregory Gym, If I remember correctly, it was up to 31 but you played with 2s and 3s. These are established already. I don’t know who came up with them, and I haven’t been to Gregory in over 5 years, but I guarantee you if I go again it will be the same.
Playgrounds are different if the same dudes don’t come around regularly. If it’s a different cast of characters, then the winning score is negotiated before the game begins. Twelve to fifteen baskets is usually pretty good, with the former being better. You don’t want to tire out, anything over fifteen baskets takes too long, and remember you aren’t the only ones that wanna get in there.
Know the lingo…
Nothing’s more embarrassing than when you walk into the gym and don’t know what the hell people are saying. We’ve covered “who’s got next” and “you got five.” Here are some other things you need to know (these vary from place to place):
· The pill: the basketball, rarely used.
· Straight up: and understood rule that the winner of the game will only need to win by one point/basket.
· Deuce: the opposite, the winning team must win by at least two baskets. Think of tennis, it works the same way.
· Old School: this is a nickname for the senior member of the gym. There is always an older guy (late 30s, early 40s) at the gym that still plays with the young guys. Being called “old school” is the ultimate sign of respect. Everyone respects this person for playing with guys that are 15 or 20 years younger.
· Ball don’t lie: Since there is no referee, there are often disputes on possession calls. One guy says it was out on the other dude, the other dude says the opposite. You can spend all day disputing the call, so to settle the dispute in the fairest way possible, one guy will “shoot for it.” If he makes it, his team gets possession, if he misses the other team does. After this happens, someone always says, “Ball don’t lie.” Call it basketball karma.
· Who’s flavor: I have heard this ONCE from this guy. Basically he asked, “Who’s flavor?” What he really meant was, “Who is currently winning the game right now?” Which brings us to our next word.
· The count: “What’s the count?” is another way to ask, “What is the score?” It is very important to know “the count” or the score at all times in pickup. Often you will hear guys scream out the score after every couple possessions or every made basket. This is important for a few reasons: 1) there is no scoreboard, 2) you want the other team to know how much you have (and what they have), and 3) you want to make sure the other team doesn’t pull a fast one on you and add a point to their real total. I do this often to make sure that guys are paying attention. Their fault if they’re not.
· Check: On dead balls, offensive possessions start with a member of the defensive team “checking” the ball and giving it to the offensive player at the top of the three-point line. Once this happens, the ball is now “live” but the offensive player must pass it in to a teammate.
· Pick right/left: Yelled out by a defensive player to another defensive player when an offensive player is going to set a pick. Nothing is more annoying than getting picked and not being told by your teammates. Usually the guy who is getting picked will then say “switch” or “stay.”
· Cash/Money/Ice/Net/WAP/Wet/Swish: They all mean the same thing, a dude yells this when his shot goes in without hitting the rim.
There’s probably some things I left out, but that’s what the comment section is for! Feel free to add your own!
Don’t…
DO NOT wear headbands, armbands, elbow pads, and a matching Jordan top with shorts. It’s cool to wear some nice shorts and kicks, but don’t go all out. You’re not out there to advertise for Nike so chill on that. And don’t come out there with the Iverson sleeve unless you absolutely need it.
DO NOT call every little ticky-tack foul. Again, with no ref it’s up to the players to police themselves. But some dudes go overboard and call every little thing. SO annoying, you’re gonna get hit, deal with it. On that note…
DO NOT let an obvious fall call go uncalled. This will quickly piss off your teammates. If someone hacks you, you have to call it, otherwise you’re giving up possession on an obvious no-call.
DO NOT faintly call a foul. If you get fouled call it out loud so everyone will know to stop playing.
DO NOT go out there and purposely try to hurt someone. At the end of the day, pickup ball is all about having fun and working out, no one is there to get hurt.
DO NOT shoot too much, especially if you suck. Sometimes you’re on fire, if you’re hitting a good percentage of your jumpers go ahead and shoot. But if you’re making 1 out of 10 you need to chill for a minute and let someone else shoot.
DO NOT talk smack to an obviously inferior player…unless he’s asking for it. If it’s someone that’s on your level then do what you do, but if the guy sucks don’t rub it in his face.
DO NOT ruin it! Pickup ball is, and this might sound dumb but its true, a spiritual experience for some people. It's a great way to have fun and build camaraderie with your friends or complete strangers!
That’s all I got for now, I’ll comment if I got any more!
No comments:
Post a Comment